"Four Men In A Boat - To Say Nothing Of The Cox".  Terse Verse by "Stroke"

    This `ere ode's la Douggie Wooler

    The Soar's most crafty rudder puller

    Who steers his boat like old Ascari

    Having a dice with Nuvolari.

    On one fine night we nearly sank

    You missed the bend and rammed the bank

    Which shows that when you're on the water

    Don't think of things you did'nt oughter.

    When mating swans you chanced to meet

    You spurred your crews to action fleet

    And with a neat evading action

    Made them stare with stupifaction.

    All through the year you sat a martyr

    But there never was a cox, Sir, smarter

    At skidding round the Ferry bend

    Whilst waving to the Reverend.

    With feet asleep and pain in neck

    Those ruddy lines you pulled, by Heck

    To reach the Plough and get your crew

    Their weekly pint of Stanton's brew.

    You dashed up there Sir, at the double

    And though we've been a lot of trouble

    Hope you will agree to steer

    The Old Men's Crew another year.

    The season now has quickly sped

    His ancient crew safe tuck'd in bed

    In rosy dream still hear him call :-

    "Just three more strokes, blokes" - EASY - ALL"

There's copy in the Old Men's Four

To make up verse for evermore

Here the secret can be read

Of how they earn their daily bread.

Bow rakes in with air so gay

The remnants of our weekly pay

Then with spells and incantations

Shrinks it with his machinalions.

Two, unlike our other toilers

Makes both big and little boilers

And then he works for weeks and weeks

Raising steam and caulking leaks

Number three says "Take a dekko

At my advert in the Echo"

"Just for your Sir, I can fix,

Coats in this style - 4/6"

Stroke now he both makes and sells

Whacking great big blooming' bells

And bores you with his adulation

Of their tintinnabulation

Every day, excepting Sundays

Cox makes lace for ladies' undies

For ladies short and ladies long

And also those with embonpoint

When sun's a sinking in the west

You'll see them all in shorts and vest

With knobbly knees and shanks a quiver

Paddling up and down the river.